How to insult 1000 people in one go.

I went to a wedding on Friday. It was my boyfriend's colleague's wedding so I wanted to make a good impression.. I wanted to look smart so I picked a knee-length floaty cream dress and my beige mango shoes that I totally love:

I thought, I'm looking sophisticated. It was an Indian wedding, but I assumed there would be other British people there in non-Indian clothing. We got a taxi there so we could both enjoy ourselves and have a bit to drink.

Anyway, I turned up and instantly knew I'd made a mistake. Everyone was in full length dresses, and those who weren't had leggings down to their ankles. We were the only non-Indian people there. It turns out is was a Muslim wedding and people were dressed much like this:

By then it was too late, and I knew I had to spend the rest of the night standing out like a sore thumb feeling like a hooker. I didn't have a low cut dress, and it wasn't especially short, but it was clear I had made a big mistake. There were no other British people there, even my boyfriend's work friends were of Indian heritage. 

The wedding was HUGE. They had hired out a huge hall and there were about 1000 guests. Thankfully we spent most of the time seated on a balcony above the main hall were there weren't too many guests. We went downstairs for a short time, and said hello to the bride. That was the worst bit because everyone knew I didn't fit in and I felt like they thought I had deliberately set out to insult their beliefs. To make things worse, the bride knew who I was when she met me and I just wanted to say "I'm sorry if I've inadvertently ruined your wedding." Anyway, it's over now, and I can laugh about it. It also has amused a few of my friends.

Anyway, if you get invited to an Indian wedding.... check if it is Muslim, and cover up. Please don't make the same mistake I did. Sigh.